19 working days / 3.5 weeks to end of IAP

I am just waiting for the time to pass. Hoping for it to be 13feb already.
=0(

I hate to whine and all, but IAP is really sucking life out of me! The journey to work is as tormenting! I can't stand the people (*read:human*) I am with in the bus/train. I can't stand their never-ending gossiping. How can people tolerate living like this for the rest of their life?! I know they need to earn a decent living and all. But trading your life for a "decent living" is like so wasteful!

You want a decent living because you want to live. But you forgot that you want to live because you want to enjoy the many happy things there are (*if it even exist*) in the world. Then in a way, you are working and earning a decent living for nothing!

I don't know I think of life this way because I am still young or not. But it's painful to work because you have got no choice. And for the rest of your life, you will be in pain. Then what's the point of living? Unless you say, you are working for a good cause - passion, to support your passion. But it isn't that easy right? Because we all have families and we have to be responsible to them too. Arr~ Everything's so suffocating.

It's worst now. Retrenchment. High standard of living. I am already feeling it! I top up my ez-link card more than two times a week. Each time being $10 and most of the time, I top up my card three times a week. And that would mean at least $30 a week and in a month I would have spent $120 on transport! And the distance is from my house to my workplace in Marsiling. Pretty expensive I would say although my attachmen allowance can actually pay for it. But I seriously need my attachment allowance to see the doctor for my insanity! =X Oh yea, I heard the news about the increase in people with mental problems. How not to expect it! I am near insanity already much less people working in even more stressful situations! The End of the World will not happen with a meteor rain or anything drastic, but people eating each other due to mental problems! Ohkayy... that's a pretty scary thought and I am freaking myself out!

But you know, I am just feeling very not right about my attachment! I had rather take 10 times of examination rather than having attachment luh! But in a way, I guess it's actually my problem. I seriously have this problem which hinders whatever I am doing. *sighs* I can never understand why too. Coming to work actually feels like facing dementors! There's a similarity! They suck happiness out of you, leaving you with nothing but pessismistic thoughts! Which is bad luh!

Grrrrrr... I envy my hamsters although they barely have space to do a 2.4km run. We all think that the grass is greener on the other side.

- Michelle